My Birthday Wish

A while back, I stopped praying for myself. I still would pray for other people but I some how felt it was wrong to pray for myself.

I did however allow myself to pray/wish for something on my birthdays. It was just my little way of asking the universe, one time a year, for something that was dear to my heart. In September 2006 I got off birth control and asked the universe to make conceiving not too hard on me. I didn't expect it to be easy. I just wanted to have the strength to be able to not become a wreck over it. As most of you know, I was pregnant 2 weeks after getting off birth control. Do I think it was because of my wish? Yes, I do. I've had too many things that I've asked for on my birthday fall into place.

This year, I started preparing for my wish. I'm sure most of you can guess what I asked for. But I did add something else to that. I have a good friend who has been trying for a few years now. She never had any indication of issues and I don't believe they've found anything conclusive in the tests they've been running. My wish was that though I wanted another baby, I really wanted her to have one more. I have my little Z. Even though I want another, I can't say my heart isn't content with him.

This Sunday, I called to tell her the news. I can't tell you how badly I felt. She was so happy for me. I was torn for a while. Should I tell her right away or should I wait a bit. I didn't want her to think, in any way, that I felt I couldn't share with her. So I told her. But in turn, I hope I didn't add a distance to us. I want to be there for her if she needs me. More importantly, I'm really really hoping my birthday wish comes through for her the way it did for me.

By the way, I've started a new blog just about the pregnancy. This is more for me and the baby to share. It's a week by week progress of how I feel, physically and mentally. That doesn't mean I won't post here, but there I'll do an update every week.

Here it is: Mina's Second

Scheduled Blogs

The goal is to make the effort to at least blog once a week. Looking at my previous entry’s date, I’ll say starting now!

One of the reasons I stopped blogging was because of how busy I’ve been lately at work. We’re in the process of doing an enhancement to our application and the business rules are known most thoroughly by me. So I’m basically straddling two positions. Software Developer and this new acronym called SME (Subject Matter Specialist). We’ve had a trip to Chicago for this project already and are hoping to deliver by November. So things are a bit hectic and busy for me. Especially since I only work 30 hours a week. But I have to admit. I really love it. I love the challenge. I love the responsibility. I actually really love working. Ideally though, I would work closer to home. The hour commute really does a lot to piss me off. Thank God I don’t drive it.

I’ve spent a lot of my down time reading blogs. Unfortunately, no Xanga blogs because it’s blocked from here. But I’ve found a new community. The romance novel community! All these people that have this love for romance novels and blog reviews and news about upcoming books! I’m so grateful they exist!

I’ve had plenty of friends in my life. I’ve been able to share different aspects of my interests and personalities. I’ve never really had any close friends that could share my love of romance novels so completely. I’ve had friends that have read a few of my favorites. But none that I could share the love of the genre with. And now, with the new paranormal romances, my craving for fantasy has been appeased with romance novels too! Anyway, my point is I’m very grateful to all the romance bloggers out there. I feel very much less alone then I use to.

My dream come true would be a book club though. One that meets once a week or once every other week. It doesn’t even have to be limited to romance. Oh well, maybe one day.

Now, to find a few RL friends that are ex-gamers as well. Life would be complete!