Update - 9/7

I haven’t really been able to update in a while and if you’re one of those people that come here regularly, I apologize. I haven’t really been comfortable this month and therefore, couldn’t bring myself to actually verbalize much.

A quick update:

I am now officially off birth control pill and let me say that I am very very pleased about this. Not because I’m in a rush to start a family either. Ever since I started tri-phasic BCP (3 different hormone dosages) I’ve been pretty much a wreck. I spent my birthday sobbing into the phone while J assured me I was normal and wasn’t going crazy. I cried as if my heart was breaking but it wasn’t. It was horrible. I could not calm myself at all. I know J tends to get a bit impatient with me when I’m overly emotional (primarily due to the hormones) and I really don’t blame him. I get impatient with myself and he’s had to deal with this, on and off, for the past 2 years. But this Monday (my birthday) really affected him. I wasn’t being overly emotional. I just had absolutely NO control and it hit him really hard. He called me every hour after that to make sure I was okay. Thankfully, it’s over for now. I’m not going to say I’ll never get back on birth control again, but it definitely won’t be the first choice.

My trip to the OB/GYN went really badly. It was the first time I actually had issues with the way the doctor was. It wasn’t that she was a bad doctor. It was that she definitely wasn’t the calming influence that I need through this. I love my Primary Care Doctor so I’m going to go to her in a few weeks and get a referral to an OB/GYN in my area. I think I’ll just stay away from OB/GYN’s unless my doctor really thinks I need to see one.

I have plenty of other thoughts going on in my head, but I think I’ll leave them for another post.