My Birthday Wish

A while back, I stopped praying for myself. I still would pray for other people but I some how felt it was wrong to pray for myself.

I did however allow myself to pray/wish for something on my birthdays. It was just my little way of asking the universe, one time a year, for something that was dear to my heart. In September 2006 I got off birth control and asked the universe to make conceiving not too hard on me. I didn't expect it to be easy. I just wanted to have the strength to be able to not become a wreck over it. As most of you know, I was pregnant 2 weeks after getting off birth control. Do I think it was because of my wish? Yes, I do. I've had too many things that I've asked for on my birthday fall into place.

This year, I started preparing for my wish. I'm sure most of you can guess what I asked for. But I did add something else to that. I have a good friend who has been trying for a few years now. She never had any indication of issues and I don't believe they've found anything conclusive in the tests they've been running. My wish was that though I wanted another baby, I really wanted her to have one more. I have my little Z. Even though I want another, I can't say my heart isn't content with him.

This Sunday, I called to tell her the news. I can't tell you how badly I felt. She was so happy for me. I was torn for a while. Should I tell her right away or should I wait a bit. I didn't want her to think, in any way, that I felt I couldn't share with her. So I told her. But in turn, I hope I didn't add a distance to us. I want to be there for her if she needs me. More importantly, I'm really really hoping my birthday wish comes through for her the way it did for me.

By the way, I've started a new blog just about the pregnancy. This is more for me and the baby to share. It's a week by week progress of how I feel, physically and mentally. That doesn't mean I won't post here, but there I'll do an update every week.

Here it is: Mina's Second