Wednesday, September 13, 2006

All Over the Place

So things have slowed down at work and I’m able to actually think about something to post. I do this while listening to Alanis Moreissette who always takes me into a self reflective state of mind. It’s funny how many people consider her “angry” when her songs, for the most part, aren’t at all. It really bugs me when people take one aspect of her that became popular and identify her that way. Because of this, they lump anyone that appreciates her music into the “angry” woman category.

My parents come to visit this weekend. I’m really looking forward to seeing them! It’s been almost a year! It just happened that anytime we were ready to come visit, they were traveling. Then we got to the point where we just ran out of vacation time because of our trip to Europe and couldn’t get enough time off.

I decided to quit the gym I was part of. I realized that maybe the gym is the reason I’ve been slacking off even more. I just don’t really get excited going there. It’s “only” functional. Plus, I think it’s time for me to do something slightly different. And I just didn’t feel comfortable taking any type of class there.

I’m going to try a different gym that is smaller and actually costs more, but it’s a lot cuter and much cozier. I already signed up to go to Belly Dancing Classes every Saturday morning. I’ve taken Belly Dancing before and loved it. I had muscles ache in places where I thought I only had bone. But it was great! I miss dancing but I’m just not up for going “clubbing” anymore. I guess I’m just getting old. Plus, I married a white boy that is so not into “dancing”. It really is a good thing he’s so cute.

As far as anxiety levels, I feel them going down. I’m definitely sure it’s mental but I don’t know if it’s because I’ve stopped worrying about being 30 and getting off birth control pills, or the relief of getting my body off birth control pills. I’m a bit excited actually. I want to get to know who I am without artificially having hormones in my body. I know it sounds silly, but it’s true. I just remember being so different when I was in high school. Not totally in a good way but there were aspects of me that I tend to miss too. Now, 12 years later, I’ve had natural changes in my body chemistry and personality. I want to know who I am now. I guess it’s one of the reasons I’m not overly eager about getting pregnant right away. I wouldn’t mind giving myself at least a handful of months to just be.

Time to head out and grab some lunch. Hope everyone else is doing well!


Blogger Kristie (J) said...

I can totally relate to you wanting to get to know yourself without any medication. I have antidepressants and sleeping pills. I really don't like taking them and I don't that often because I'm different when I'm on them. I'm glad you're feeling better.
And I've been tempted to take belly dancing lessons too. Never got around to it, but maybe sometime I will :)

1:01 AM  

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